More and More Every Day – Gabriela, 4/6/20

Waiting Until Everyone is Asleep

Gabriela
Student, South Mountain Community College

As a student, I have been affected in many ways by the invisible enemy known as COVID-19.

Although I am not taking on-campus classes this semester, I am enrolled in online classes. I have been affected emotionally, physically, and mentally. Sometimes everything that is going around – people being sick and people dying – seems unreal, but then I tell myself to be brave that everything will be good soon.

I have been having anxiety, which I did not have previously, but due to the pandemic I’ve become anxious. I have anxiety because when I have to go grocery shopping it scares me that I am around people, since I do not know if the people around have the virus. Going to get groceries makes me nauseous and gives me headaches. These past weeks I have been stressed out and worried about what will happen the next day. For this reason, I stay informed by the watching or reading the news.

It has affected me physically since I have not been able to go to the library or Starbucks. I usually would go to study and do my homework to be alone and be able to focus. Being at home with my kids, it is challenging to have a quiet space and be able to read. Now, I have to wait until everyone is sleeping to be able to focus and get my work done, which has made me sleepy through my day.

As mandated by Governor Ducey, keeping our social distance is important to avoid the spread of the virus. Physically, I can’t really go anywhere to use WiFi and be able to study. If I go out any where I start getting anxiety. Mentally, I am getting confused about the future and I have been feeling drained. To relax, I go out for walks, read, cook, drink wine, clean, keep in touch with my family, and color.

Another thing that is hard for me mentally is staying home every day. I used to drive 45min, five days a week to go to work. At work I would feel like it would help to get away from the everyday house chores. House chores are repetitive and tiring. It’s mentally tiring to stay at home and not socialize with other adults. These are some of the things that before would help me to relax and re-energize but lately I have been feeling tired all the time.

The only thing that helps me to cope with the stress and anxiety is my religious belief. It keeps me positive during this hard time my faith, hope, and love for Jesus is the motor of my life. I read my bible scripture and I pray that is what gives me hope that everything will work out for good. Another thing that does help is listening to my worship music or Christian rap. Music eases my anxiety and my fear.

I’ve come to hope that at the end of this pandemic we as a nation will become stronger than before.

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