Ready to give up

By D.H.
Student, South Mountain Community College

There is so much that people take for granted during COVID-19 and I can personally admit to that. Simply saying that the COVID-19 has impacted my life as a student is an understatement, it’s impacted my daily living. I am fortunate to still be employed during this pandemic. However, it has become a risk in my household as I am the only one that is not working from home. One of my roommates was unfortunate and lost their job, they had to file for unemployment.

On top of businesses being closed, my roommates losing their jobs, my employment transitioning to curb-side pick-up only, and being forced to stay indoors, now my education relies on a full-time computer screen. I have had to give up social interacting with peers on campus. I can no longer go into my instructor’s office for one-to-one help. I can no longer look forward to driving to school and making jokes with my classmates and instructor.

I’ve lost hope in learning because in-person interaction will always be far more superior than learning online. Being forced to complete the semester strictly online through a computer screen has been extremely difficult. My on-campus classes this semester are classes that I would never suggest for anyone to complete online. They are math and an accounting course, the two classes I have always been advised to never do online. Although, my instructors are very understanding of the COVID-19 situation it does not take away from the fact that I am now learning online. Now, I must wake up and log into a computer screen to complete the semester. As a college student, that is emotionally draining. Not to mention I have been having internet issues throughout this pandemic, which has put me behind in most of my courses.

I reached a point where I was just ready to give up, but I know that I am better than that.

At the end of the day we are all going through a major transition in our lives and we have to accept it.

There have been days when I wake up and I am feeling positive, hopeful that this will all end soon. Then, I have days where I am unable to sleep because I have so many thoughts running through my head on what led us here to begin with and it takes a toll on my emotional health. We are all human, and it is normal to experience these thoughts and feelings, which I have learned to accept. I just hope that my instructors can sympathize with their students during this time because we are struggling. COVID-19 will still be going on for months and we must be prepared and work together through all of this.

I have learned to accept the situation and I am slowly adjusting to the changes I have had to make throughout my life. I still hope to finish off the semester to the best of my abilities.

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